Active Listening Part 1: Receive

In a highly distracted world where people often multi-task while “listening” to someone, we often can be left feeling unheard or unworthy of someone’s full attention. Whether we are listening to someone in a spiritual direction session or simply listening to a family member, friend or acquaintance sharing a story, the way we listen can make all the difference to the individual about how they feel about sharing, and whether they feel valued and worthy of being heard. To give someone our full attention is a gift and is key to creating trust and a deepening relationship. This three-part blog post will identify three key elements to active, deep listening which involves receiving, reflecting and responding. Here’s let’s unpack what it means to receive someone’s message.

We receive someone’s story first by our silent presence. We make eye contact and remain attentive, present, without distraction, tuned in and watching for the movement of the Spirit in what is being shared and what is stirring within. We listen without moving ahead in our own inner dialogue to what we want to say next. We stay with or abide with the person speaking. We come as empty vessels, to receive the words being spoken verbally, as well as what is spoken through heir body language. We also listen between the lines to what is not being said. We don’t interrupt but let the individual speak until they stop. We avoid trying to figure out anything for the individual. We simply hold all that is offered with a posture of silent, welcoming grace. This is the hospitable gift of listening well.